Old men can have a social life

In spring of 2024, I summoned all my old-guy courage and started a twice monthly lunch on my back deck for the retired men I know. It was my one-man effort to break through barriers that so often prevent older men from establishing social connections outside their families. The story of my quest was published last year, here, here, here, and for the readers of business news, here.

After a tough start, the lunches caught on and by the time the fall rains came, I had a handful of regulars. Most of them were men who had reasonably robust social connections already. I had cracked none of the hard cases. The very isolated older men I know chose to stay that way. But after one summer, I considered my project a modest success.

One of the big changes took place in me. My fear of approaching people and asking them to my home was gone. I accepted that some would come, some wouldn’t, and I wouldn’t die if my invites were ignored.

The response in 2025 was great. Participants from 2024 were uniformly ready to take up their napkins and eat again.

I asked some new guys, and they showed the same suspicion and hesitancy that the original crew had exhibited a year earlier. I got the this-is-not-what men-do look. None…

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My First Retired-guy Backyard Lunch of 2025 Was a Smashing Success