The Mandalorian And Grogu Commit the Worst Crime A Star Wars Movie Can By Being Completely Forgettable
I saw the Mandalorian and Grogu movie last week, or at least I think I did. The oft-echoed read of it being little more than an expanded Mandalorian episode scanned, but it felt somehow less than that. It felt completely unspecial and forgettable. Lots of cuteness bombs, lots of fighting to anticipated conclusions, and action scenes that were so dimly lit my eyes stopped caring about the SFX slop in front of me.
We’re well past the time when we should expect every Star Wars movie to be great. Still, even the historically bad ones leave you with something you can’t forget – be it an awesome villain, epic fight, or even merely a story that adds some small wrinkle to the overall lore. This had none of that and was, quite probably, the least visually interesting chapter in the long history of the Star Wars universe. If it resembled a long episode of a TV show, it would not have been one of the better ones.
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And A Child Shall Lead The Box Office
20-year-old director Kane Parsons has broken records and brains with the success of A24’s Backrooms. With that stunning success has come doubters who suspect he got some expert hand-holding from some of the film’s producers, who happen to also be more experienced filmmakers. This stuff is, of course, completely smoke without fire and a reminder that despite its endless, vampiric craving for new talent, people will still turn their nose up at new ideas coming from fresh voices who haven’t come up through the usual pipelines.
In Parsons’ case, he’s part of a new generation of YouTube creators who are going to have a direct influence on the look of movies and television to rival that of the gaggle of music video directors who impacted films in the ‘80s and ‘90s. And while Parsons is doing things not typical of a 20-year-old, please remember he’s just a few years younger than Scorsese and Spielberg were when they directed their first films. Let the young man cook, is what I’m saying.
Hacks Finale Reaffirms That The Generation Gap Is Worth Crossing
The Hacks Eurotrip finale took us on an adventure for the show’s central characters. The kind of “hang out” episode we don’t get nearly enough of from TV shows, though it might have been more fun without the sword of Damocles hanging over the proceedings. Without that planned train ride to Zurich threatening us all in the corner of the room, though, the emotional heft of the episode wouldn’t have been as present, pulling at our heartstrings as we reflected on the connection between Ava and Deborah and how much each affected growth and brought out the best in the other. That platonic love story also served as a reminder of one of the show’s most durable themes: that we’re best if we break out of the tidy boxes society puts us in, and that the generational divide is worth crossing.
I will admit that I really thought Hacks was going to go all the way with its assisted suicide storyline, respecting Deborah’s final wishes and adding real finality to the series. The degree of difficulty with that would have been off the charts, but I believe show creators Lucia Aniello, Paul W. Downs, and Jen Statsky could have pulled off that kind of shocking and weighty ending with the show still seeming like the show. In the end, however, we got a closing statement that reflects the ethos of the characters and the show they inhabited: that there is always a way to find the funny in any situation. That’s particularly valuable in shitty times when we forget to try and laugh at the absurdity and randomness of things like life, death, success, and failure.
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Escape From Zack Snyder’s Escape From New York
They’ve been threatening to remake John Carpenter’s Escape From New York for years, but the reported Zack Snyder-helmed version might have the juice to go all the way… before failing miserably.
Allow me to sound ancient, but certain iconic roles should be off-limits to reinterpretation and IP life extension. And Kurt Russell’s Snake Plissken is one of them (let’s say Indiana Jones and Marty McFly are a couple of others, though boredom may nudge me to list more out down the road). Anyone who tries to be Snake is going to come off like they’re doing a poor impression. And Snyder’s style feels all wrong for a franchise that doesn’t lend itself to slow-motion self-seriousness. Watch Carpenter’s sequel, Escape From LA, for an idea of how serious he was about the character and franchise.
All of the above stands, but if I’m being honest, my real objection comes from wishing Carpenter and Russell had gotten the chance to close the franchise how they wanted, with the unmade Escape From Earth film. That, or some kind of bare-bones western-style send-off with Snake navigating the lawless wasteland of a world he had taken back to the stone age in the second film.
The positive buzz surrounding the new Masters Of The Universe movie is one part of the puzzle that will unlock further mining of 80s and 90s IP (obviously, a big box office return is the other, much more consequential piece). And every time these things come around, it’s a good reminder for large adult children of my age to remember the importance of sharing with others. So, sure, go ahead, Zack. Make your Snake movie, but he better have a rockin mullet and be an absolute problem from beyond the arc.
Escape From L.A. (1996) - Basketball to the Death Scene (6/10) | MovieclipsMovieclips
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John Oliver Makes It Weird
The best thing I saw this week was this smutty digression from Last Week Tonight when John Oliver ponders a threesome between himself and two of the cartoon characters he has previously played. It’s such a specific bit of wonderful weirdness.
Trump’s Pardons: Last Week Tonight with John Oliver (HBO)LastWeekTonight
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