It may seem like a different time but cast your mind back to the big news event of 2020. 2021 too to be honest.
I am, of course, referring to COVID-19. Remember it?
“Ahh”, I hear you say. “That”. For many of us it’s something we’ve tried to forget, with good reason. Too many days, even months, avoiding family and friends, and in places like Melbourne Australia, enduring the longest, highly restrictive lockdowns, which the state government insisted was the only solution, despite other Australian states, and many other countries, deciding against such autocratic measures (disclosure here, I live in Melbourne, and endured the first of the major lockdowns in 2020, before moving interstate for a year. I love Melbourne, but I loved not being there in 2021).
Let’s get some serious stuff out of the way now. Yes, I do know the pandemic wasn’t something to be laughed at, taking lives, and still having a health impact on many. Yes, I also know it’s still out there. I am aware that businesses are still suffering, city offices are still unpopulated and there is and will be mental health impacts. Hopefully this has addressed the outrage one or two of you have been building up to, and save you the need to complain to me, or about me. Maybe not?
But let’s put that aside for a minute and think back to what many of us did to fill the time they had now they couldn’t go to work and were stuck at home. As well as drinking at home many took up sourdough baking. Others learnt the guitar while some gained real expertise at X Box and PlayStation.
For some though podcasts became the passion, and I mean creating their own, not just listening to them. Let’s be honest now. That resulted in some really bad ones. It might have sounded like a good idea to get a heap of your mates together and shoot the shit, hell at the pub on a Friday night these guys were hilarious! Unfortunately, a drunken night out watching footy and trying to crack on to the barmaid doesn’t always translate into audio gold.
What about a show on cooking? Janet makes the best pasta and Rob’s awesome at barbecuing chops. People would love to hear their hints. Actually, most people would prefer watching paint dry. I could go on, and on, and on, and on, and on, and on but I think you get the picture.
Some have survived and some were pretty good, and still are, but I’m just as sure many of them deservedly tanked.
This passionate embrace of podcasting led to the creation of a satirical Public Service Announcement video created by the Australian Broadcasting Corporation in the first year of the pandemic urging its viewers not to start a podcast. It was voiced by a selection of its own leading broadcasters and a range of Australian celebrities urging you to do something else, with bandanna wearing author Peter Fitzsimons telling us, “We don’t need your true crime exclusive, which is just you reading Wikipedia articles to your housemate,” amongst some of the suggestions why you should avoid one (You can watch it below). Given that many of them taking part were actually working on their own podcast, or a regular guest on someone else’s, created its own drama and claims of hypocrisy. It is bloody funny though, and there are others like coming out elsewhere.
This one below is also quite funny.
To all accounts that advice was ignored then, and still is, and the passion for creating one hasn’t died off. During the 2022 Australian federal election I worked as media manager for one of the independent candidates, and virtually from day one we were being approached by podcasters looking for an interview with her. Some were from high profile hosts, and we were happy to take part. But as the election got closer and it was clear she was a real threat to the incumbent the interest in her, what she had to say and what she stood for, increased massively. I can’t remember who all the approaches were from, but they ranged from school principals, tech savvy teenagers, to a heap of uni students, who apparently had started a podcast as part of their course assessment. I do feel for the poor lecturer who had to listen to all of them and give feedback, but maybe that’s something that floats their boat.
The problem was that nearly all of them were looking for a minimum two-hour commitment to record their show, and when I told them that was not possible, it often wasn’t taken well by the budding future broadcast star. Truth was as the election got closer, we were dolling out media interviews in five-to-10-minute slots and only to those media outlets we judged worked best at getting our message across to prospective voters, with many requests rejected or ignored. If you were one of those podcasters who we didn’t work with, I’m sorry.
But I digress. Back to now and the future, and it seems there isn’t a quasi-celebrity, fashion blogger, history fan, financial pundit, business savant, beer and wine love, home cook, or sports nut who hasn’t created a podcast, not to mention that aforementioned bunch of mates who reckon the whole world shares their sense of humour.
As well the major print mastheads have climbed on board with podcasts featuring their star reporters, invariably the crime reporters, with their own exclusive (their words, not mine) on the dirty world of crime and the hero coppers who fight it. Every radio network is also turning round their program and creating a signature podcast, starring their own network stars. The fact that often this is just a recording of a radio show seems to be greatly unspoken about, but there must be money and listeners in it, or it wouldn’t be done. Either that or it’s being done because everyone else is doing it.
So, what for the future?
Here’s a vision for the podcasts of tomorrow. That said, my vision may well be your nightmare.
True Crime
As an observer, true crime podcasting seems to have taken off like the roadrunner.
Some Australian mastheads seem to have multiples of them, covering any number of cases, not to mention the special interview programs hosted by their star police and courts rounds people. Then of course there’s the behemoth that is “Serial” from NPR in the USA, and “Trace” from Australia’s ABC. Pretty sure if I looked at other countries I’d find the same thing in any variety or language. Unfortunately, english is the only one I know, so I’ll stick that.
But what happens when all the good stories have been told? When there’s not enough coppers or reformed criminals who can put together a sentence? When police departments start saying no, as budding podcasters, starved of positive stories start looking at crime stories which don’t cover the various forces in glory?
Well, I reckon there’s a podcast in that. In a series of hard-hitting interviews with true crime podcasters we look at the issues they now face creating their podcast. I’m sure we’ll find one of them who’s happy to describe the fight he and his producer (read that as best mate/buddy) had with another podcast to get to the star detective in a high-profile murder and secure them as talent, unfortunately missing out. They can then explain the financial difficulties they’ve faced as sponsors passed on backing them.
Or there’s the podcaster who hit a brick wall getting anybody to talk about the con man who fleeced millions from investors, and was left to rely on Wikipedia, back issues of the Herald Sun and a psychologist who’d had nothing to do the with case (he mostly worked as a relationships counsellor) but was happy to share their opinion.
Another can talk about how the state police department refused to comment or assist on his podcast and even worked hard to ensure no one else would either. It didn’t help that his series was focussed on major police corruption and incompetence, but he feels that wasn’t reason enough to say no.
Food and wine
I think we’re on safe ground here. Forget about talking to chefs and home cooks about inspiration and history. Let’s move on from anecdotes from winemakers and critics.
Our podcast will actually cook the recipe, while drinking the wine of choice. Now given the low budget of most podcasters, it’s likely in the early days that the recipe will be deep fried fish fingers and goon bag wine (slang for cask wine). But as the idea grows and flourishes it’s hoped one day the recipe will be rib eye steak with mushroom sauce and potato gratin on the side, with a nice stouty craft beer or shiraz to sip. It’s an absolute winner, but best to avoid slow cookers. It could get messy if you continue to sip booze while waiting eight hours for the food to cook. It may make for an interesting program but will probably be unlistenable.
Funny mates
Really, and I mean this with total warmth, please don’t go there.
You might think you’re funny, or that your best mate is really funny, and the guys from the footy team are funny, but really, you’re not.
Some of these have worked that’s for sure, but I’d love to see the stats on how many crash and burn.
So, there you have it. Three ideas for a podcast of the future. Let me know what you think would work. If it’s gold I may even claim it for my own. If so I’ll send you the link.
