Alan Martin

Was deputy editor on Alphr, now a tech and politics freelancer.

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Last 30 daysDec 22, 2020 – Jan 20, 2021
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Dec. 19, 2019

Pie is Pornhub's most popular Android OS⁠

@alan_p_martin WHEN WE FIND OURSELVES in times of trouble, we turn to our creature comforts. In our case, that's the 2019 Pornhub insights page. Hey, don't yuck our yum. We thought we'd successfully drilled out every last nugget of tech-related gold…

Dec. 17, 2019

The Inquirer

Wearables in 2019: Hitting the limits of watches⁠

@alan_p_martin BACK IN 2015, people with too much time on their hands forecasted that 245 million wearables would be sold in 2019. Given only 84 million of them were sold at the time of the prediction, that felt like a stretch, and yet here we are…

Dec. 12, 2019

The Inquirer

iPhone users are officially more horny than Android fans⁠

@alan_p_martin LIKE PEOPLE WHO buy PlayBoy for the articles, we've been reading the alarmingly in-depth PornHub 2019 Insights page. There are some surprisingly interesting findings in there so strap on in. For starters, iPhone users appear to be more…

Dec. 11, 2019

The Inquirer

A fully souped-up Mac Pro will set you back over £48,000⁠

@alan_p_martin DOES YOUR BUSINESS NEED to spend all its 2019 budget in a hurry? Apple has its own version of Brewster's Millions where you can burn through said budget in seconds by upgrading the brand new cheese grater-inspired Mac Pro with a whole…

Dec. 5, 2019

The Inquirer

Election 2019: What do the party manifestos say about tech?⁠

IF YOU'VE GOT an Advent calendar, it serves two purposes this year. Counting down to Christmas, but also counting down to DemocracyFest 2019 - or the 2019 United Kingdom general election, if you want to be formal. Now that manifestos are digitally…

Dec. 2, 2019

The Inquirer

Google has banned eight Tory ads since the election campaign began⁠

@alan_p_martin IT'S BEEN 11 DAYS since Google said it'd be looking out for whoppers in political advertising in the upcoming UK election. Since then, the search giant has found time to ban no fewer than eight adverts from the party that's been…

Nov. 15, 2019

The Inquirer

PayPal has cut-off over 100,000 Pornhub performers⁠

@alan_p_martin PAYPAL HAS CLUTCHED ITS PEARLS in horror after learning it might have paid fornicators on its books, and pulled the plug on over 100,000 PornHub performers. The sudden change specifically affects performers who are part of the site's…

Nov. 15, 2019

The Inquirer

The cost of a sponsored post on Instagram has shot up 1,125 per cent since 2014⁠

@alan_p_martin MARKETING FIRM IZEA has just released a report that's likely to make you choke on your cool, refreshing Pepsi Max*. It seems the average rate a brand will pay for a sponsored Instagram photo has risen from $134 in 2014 to $1,642 this…

Nov. 7, 2019

The Inquirer

The #GoodManners campaign wants to shame bullies with emoji⁠

@alan_p_martin RELAX EVERYONE: ONLINE HARASSMENT will soon be a thing of the past, and you'll have emoji to thank. Yes, soon the emoji's contribution to the world won't be limited to changing the way you look at aubergines in the fruit and veg aisle…

Nov. 4, 2019

The Inquirer

Microsoft sees a 40 per cent productivity boost from four-day week test in Japan⁠

@alan_p_martin DESPITE ALL THE TECHNOLOGICAL advancements of the last century, we've been stuck in a five-day working week for nearly 100 years. There's a wide body of evidence to suggest that's a silly idea, with work just stretching to fill the…

Nov. 4, 2019

The Inquirer

Brits are divided on the fate of their social media accounts after death⁠

@alan_p_martin MOST PEOPLE HAVE some kind of idea about what they want to happen to their money, possessions and pets when they die - but what about their social media accounts? Well YouGov, the polling company that has brought us such treats as "who…

Nov. 1, 2019

The Inquirer

Rudy Giuliani needed an Apple genius to unlock his iPhone⁠

@alan_p_martin IF YOU EVER doubted the wisdom of ‘it's not what you know, but who you know,' then cast your eyes across the Atlantic to the United States government. If you thought being made cybersecurity advisor would require extensive knowledge of…

Oct. 28, 2019

The Inquirer

Party like it's 2012: Your iPhone 5 needs an update⁠

@alan_p_martin REMEMBER 2012? London was basking in the glow of a successful Olympic Games, the United States set about electing Barack Obama for a second term, and, according to Wikipedia, Grumpy Cat was born. It was a simpler time. It was also the…

Sep. 25, 2019

The Inquirer

The positive case for Twitter bots⁠

TWITTER BOTS DON'T have a good reputation. If they're not indiscriminately firing out links to private cam shows, they're schilling for political causes with dimwitted partisanship and unfathomable hashtags. But bots have a bad rap - or at least…

Sep. 6, 2019

The Inquirer

Pornhub under fire over revenge porn profiting⁠

@alan_p_martin IT'S A GOOD WEEK for Pornhub when it's out of the public eye. If things are going well for the grumble merchants, then it's generally seen (by nearly everyone) but not heard (in headlines). This week is, therefore, not a good week, as…

Sep. 2, 2019

The Inquirer

Robot pole dancers to perform at French nightclub⁠

@alan_p_martin WE WRITE A LOT about robots taking jobs, but if you've ever seen a robot try to dance, you'll be aware that there are limits. Or so you'd hope. Apparently, SC-Club in Nantes disagrees and is introducing two new dancers to its lineup.…

Aug. 30, 2019

The Inquirer

BangBros buys pornstar doxxing site just so it could burn the hard drives⁠

@alan_p_martin INTERNET GRUMBLE MERCHANT BangBros has taken a break from its usual day-to-day of coming up with implausible storylines for well-endowed actors and actresses to bump uglies to perform a noble, if ultimately purely symbolic, act. The…

Aug. 23, 2019

The Inquirer

Samsung reportedly removed a sex toy company from a women in tech event⁠

@alan_p_martin DEJA VU, ANYONE? Earlier this year, CES stripped a sex toy maker of an award and banned her from showing the product at the event, for fear of offending the prudish men eying up the various sex robots and VR porn on display. Now…

Aug. 9, 2019

The Inquirer

Threesome hookup app 3Fun was 'a privacy train wreck'⁠

@alan_p_martin THERE ARE PLENTY of fun things that three people can do together. Ludo, Snakes and Ladders - maybe even some Lawn Darts. Of course, some people prefer to bump uglies instead, and for that, there's a number of apps for folks to get…

Aug. 6, 2019

The Inquirer

What the INQ team learned from a board game about making smartphones⁠

@alan_p_martin THIS WEEKEND, TEAM INQ met up in an East London beer garden. The purpose: to see who had absorbed the most knowledge about smartphone business models with Smartphone Inc.: a board game that simulates the cut-and-thrust world of…