Editor's note: In light of recent events, in which a draft opinion from the U.S. Supreme Court that signals an end to Roe v. Wade was leaked to the media, pro-lifers have been taking to social media to push adoption as an alternative to abortion. Your humble scribe has a few words for these people....
Hey, pro-lifers, will you stop talking about how anyone who doesn't want to raise a child can just give up their kid for adoption?
IT DOESN'T EFFING WORK THAT WAY!
While American women have had—for the time being, in most places—an absolute right to abortion, they have never had an absolute right to place their child for adoption. Adoption almost always requires both parents' consent. And, in most states, that holds true even if the father raped the mother and is serving time for the crime. He can even petition for the child to be brought to him at the prison for visitation.
So, in essence, what you're telling women in crisis pregnancies is that they have to either get the consent of someone they don't want to raise a child with to give up the child for adoption, or co-parent with someone they don't want to raise a child with. There are no other "choices."
Moving on, I've become extremely soured on adoption in these United States over the past few years. Anyone who has been paying attention to stories about adoption, both domestically and internationally, has to have seen that adoptive parents are not always all they're cracked up to be.
Remember the two moms who drove their adopted children off a cliff into the Pacific before CPS could catch up with them? Remember the stories of foreign adoptions, in which it was discovered that children were essentially stolen from poor parents of color, who never intended to give up their children, and given to rich white people who refused to give back stolen children when they found out how the children they adopted were procured? (Some countries no longer allow American parents to adopt children because of abuses of the process like this one.)
Then, of course, there's the fact that some women honestly don't believe they can give up a baby they've carried for nine months and labored to birth. Pro-lifers mutter about how "selfish" such women are, never considering that human women are the only animal expected to cheerfully hand over their baby to others to raise for the sake of making infertile rich couples happy.
And don't even get me started on the pro-life maternity homes that have pressured clients into giving up their babies for adoption, offering various carrots (e.g., a safe living situation, education assistance, job assistance) to entice vulnerable young women (often homeless teens) into agreeing to adoption for their child. Not all maternity homes do this, of course; some do, though, rationalizing their activities as providing children with "stable, loving, two-parent homes."
Adoption can work for some families, and has undoubtedly brought joy to many who otherwise might never be able to create a family. But the way it works, here and now, in this country, is only a few steps removed from human trafficking.
(Image: Couple holding a globe, Pixabay.)